Me: Ok. We’re in crisis mode. We’re skipping completely over plan B and going straight to plan C.
Flashback to several weeks ago
Me: You take Customer A. They have 140 dispensers. I need you to fix them. All of them. You have until Friday.
Coworker: But what if I fail? What do I do if I can’t fix them all?
Me: We go to plan B.
Coworker: What’s plan B?
Me: You fly to Wisconsin and you apologize profusely to the customer for not being able to fix his stuff.
Coworker: What do I do if that isn’t enough?
Me: You set yourself on fire.
Flash back to the present
Me: Remember, the whole purpose of plan B is to get the customer to feel so bad for you that he isn’t mad at us anymore. So you have to make sure he sees you when you set yourself on fire.
Coworker: Ok. I got it.